Saturday, February 20, 2010

He's done it!


Finally, Luca is potty trained!

This week has been amazing - not even 1 pair of poopy underwear!!! Woo hoo!!!

Thanks in part to Suzanne at The Potty Bootcamp . When she offered to send me her ebook, I was thrilled and so full of hope that there would be something new to try.

I have to admit that I was a bit disappointed upon receiving it because there was nothing new to us in there. BUT, reading about her methods made me realize that perhaps we weren't being forceful enough in following through with our attempts.

Before Christmas I had heard from a friend of a friend that they made their child stay in the bathroom until she pooped and that this was what worked for her. We did try it, without success. Thinking back, I now realize that we didn't wait long enough before letting him come out, thinking he just didn't have to go.

So, last Monday we decided to try this again as a last resort after having read about it in Suzanne's book. One thing that Suzanne suggested was to tell Luca that it was the doctor that said it was time to stop pooping in his pants and that he had to stay in the bathroom until he went on the toilet. At first I didn't think that this would make a difference, but then I thought about it and realized that if he didn't think it was us that was telling him to poop, he wouldn't have us to rebel against. And, that is pretty much the root of the problems we were facing with Luca- he wanted to do the opposite of what we wanted him to do.

So, after giving him the "doctor said so" speech and sending him to the bathroom, all we could do was wait. There was crying and wailing on Luca's part. We didn't engage him, just let him vent. Eventually he realized we weren't going to budge and after a loooooonnnnnggggg time, he finally sat on the toilet and pooped!

We're talking hours here. The kid ate a sandwich in the bathroom. Just remembering it gives me the willies. Ewwww. BUT, he was NOT coming out until he pooped and we meant business.

The next day it was going to be the same routine - eat breakfast, go into the bathroom until he went. I was delighted when after only half an hour he pooped!

And the best part? He was SO proud of HIMSELF!!!! He knew at this point that he could do it. That day continued with him going 3 more times (he's a mega pooper, many times a day). By the end of the day he was self initiating and just going on his own.

5 days later, I think it is safe to say that he is potty trained! He has been feeling the urge to go and heading to the bathroom himself. And all those times he had to clean himself up after pooping in his pants has made him a pretty experienced bum wiper too! I hardly have to help at all! At least that paid off....

Along with being freed from "poopy jail" he also got a big prize. A Leapster console and game had been sitting on our mantle for the last week, in plain sight, begging to be played with. Luca knew he had to poop to get it. He also knows that if he doesn't continue pooping on the toilet that the Leapster will go back up on the mantle. So far, no accidents.

I feel so much better now. My excitement and pride is just overflowing. I didn't realize how many feelings I had tied up in this debacle. Not just frustration at him but anger, disappointment and feelings of failure in my parenting. A weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

I know that there will be accidents but knowing that it won't be a repeating event day after day is so exhilirating.

I know, exhilirating is a strong word - that's how happy I am about this!

Now its Levi's turn......

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

My Sister

Today is my sister's 24th Birthday.

She is the beautiful Bride in this photo of me and my sisters.

She is one of my best friends and I love her to pieces. Gorgeous inside and out, she has a compassion that exceeds most and determination that you don't want to get in the way of.

She is a great mother and one of the 2 best sisters I could ever ask for.

Happy Birthday Jessica!

She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink. Some days, she's the reason you wish you were an only child.

~Barbara Alpert

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Killer in our midst

This morning at MOPS we had a speaker about Heart Health, being that it is February and is Heart Health Awareness month. Besides striking us all with fear, she really drove home the point that we need to take charge of our health and be advocates for our health care, prevention and treatment.

The woman that spoke suffered heart failure at the age of 38, while she was in the delivery room with her first child. She was lucky to be in the hospital and monitored and was able to be helped. She ended up having a quadruple bypass surgery, with 90% blockages in her main arteries.

She had no idea.

She had felt some symptoms but always brushed them off as something else, as we often do. Little did she know that she was harbouring a killer within her body.

1 in 4 women will develop heart disease.

More women will be diagnosed with heart disease than breast cancer.

Heart disease is the #1 killer of women. Most don't know they have it until the day they die.

Heart disease is hereditary, passed on from the mother's side. This sent chills up my spine, as both of my maternal grandparents suffered from and ultimately passed away from heart disease.

Her story is really incredible, you can go to her foundation's website, The Kelly Heart Foundation to read more or to find out where you can help.

Here is another touching website of an infant that passed away suddenly only days into her life due to a heart defect that was unkown. It could have been tested for before she left the hospital but the test isn't mandatory. Read about their cause here:
Cora's story

I came across this article today about heart health in women.

The statistics are really alarming.

Please, schedule regular visits with your doctor and advocate for yourself to get the necessary testing, especially if there is any hereditary connection to heart disease or cancer.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010


I just read a post on another blog that has touched me so deeply that I had to share not only here but on Facebook and via email to everyone I know.

This is seriously one of the most amazing, well written, awe inspiring, tear jerking stories I have ever read. I have no idea who this family is - it was a link passed on to me by a friend and I am passing it on as well.

Sometimes I feel guilty about getting to read such intimate parts of the lives of strangers through the blogosphere, but I honestly believe that this is a story just begging to be shared.

Be prepared. You will cry. You will be moved. You will be cheering this family on as they embark on this journey.

Get ready for your life to be jolted a little bit.


Go here to read about the beautiful and perfect Nella that is going to do big things.

Working Moms

Once again, I am not bothering to write my own post but am stealing from a good friend.

She has a great post about how tough it can be to be a working mom; having to figure out all the logistics of work, kids, drop offs and pick ups, maintaining a home, etc.

And then the issue of emergencies...

Yesterday Dee, my best friend and dayhome provider had to go into the doctor due to what turned out to be a tear in her cornea or something like that. Very painful and not good for vision!

Luckily I was subbing at the virtual school and there were no students in the building in the afternoon and was able to leave quickly to collect my kids from the various friends' houses that they had been farmed off to while Dee went to the optometrist.

Yesterday afternoon made me very thankful for friends that are willing to open their homes to extra kids at a moment's notice. But it also made me consider the struggles that we, as working moms have compared to dads.

It also reminded me that we are so fortunate to live in a small town where we are friends with enough people and comfortable with those people to call on them in times of need.

Without further ado, please head over to my dear friend Julianne's blog and read her article on working moms.

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Holy Crap! Literally!

So, after my last post on our poop woes, I got this comment and am so excited about it!!!

"Hi...sorry for your frustration! I'm the author of a book entitled 'The Potty Boot Camp'. In my book (not $40, I promise you!'s only $5.95) I have a chapter dedicated to this topic. I'd love to send you a complimentary copy of the eBook if you're interested to see if we might have even one 'new' idea you haven't tried. Let me know and I'll send it over! Contact me at .

Good luck - and know you're not alone! This is a very common potty training problem. You might also want to check out my blog at - just type 'poop' into the search box at the top left to find the poop articles :)

Suzanne Riffel"

I've since been to her blog and have spent a considerable amount of time reading through her questions and answers and actually have a glimmer of hope that she may have a method that will work!

I'll keep you all posted on how it goes!

Please, please, please let this be the one to work!!!!!

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

The Poop Chronicles

If you've been following me for a while, you know about the issues with poop and Luca that have plagued us for....

.....wait for it....... it comes.....

.....nearly A YEAR!!!

Yup. He's been pee trained since March of 2009. The beginning of March.

The kid REFUSES to use the toilet to do his #2 business.


Countless hours on google, talking to friends, parents, grandparents, etc. Nothing has proven sucessful.

Seriously, I DARE YOU to come up with a strategy that I have not tried. Seriously. Try me. You name it, we've tried it.

I even paid one of those internet "potty train your child in 3 days" ebooks that charge like $40 that claim 100% success. Well, they have to change their success rate because it DID NOT work for us. And I did EXACTLY as it said to do.

About a week ago I had just had it. I was in tears most of the day, and the river of tears came more fiercely each time I had to clean crap out of underwear that day (that day's tally- 5). A friend offered to take Luca for a few days to see if the change of scenery (a different adult that he wasn't super comfortable with) would help things. And being with her 3 year old twins that have been potty trained for quite some time couldn't hurt, either.

Day 1 of "poopy bootcamp" as I dubbed it went like this:

-T and her kids and Luca chatted about things big kids do (zipping zippers - which Luca did not know how to do but came home knowing!, getting dressed, pooping on the toilet, etc).

-After an entire day there, no poop whatsoever. I knew as soon as we got home he'd let go.

-But, no, he held it all day and all night.

Day 2:

-I get a phone call from Luca to tell me he pooped on the toilet! Horray!!! I allowed myself to let that little glimmer of hope shine through.

-Luca got to go to the preschool with T to get her kids and got to have a tour of the school. He was pretty impressed ang thought it looked pretty neat. The teacher told him that he could come when he pooped on the toilet every day. He seemed to buy it and was pretty excited and told Daddy about it when he got home.

(Sidenote: that morning when I was taking him to T's I reminded him that the twins were at school for the morning and would be home at lunchtime. He asked if he could go to school with them and I said not until he pooped on the toilet every day. To this he replied "I'll just go to another school then.")

- Within 20 minutes of being home he informed me he had pooped. Sigh. We went to the bathroom, where I discovered that he wasn't quite finished (TMI, I know) and he asked me to help him sit on the toilet. I helped him and he finished his business and was so proud of himself. We had a little celebration and talked about how easy it was and how happy we all were.
Day 3:
For reasons I won't go into, Luca did not go to T's for the 3rd and final day of poop bootcamp.
He pooped in his pants 4 times today.
I am SO TIRED of cleaning up poopy underwear. I feel defeated. I don't know what else to do. I'm angry. I'm done.
So, if anyone has a suggestion that works that I haven't yet tried and it results in Luca being fully trained, I will award you a BIG prize. I don't know what it will be yet, but it will be BIG, I promise!
Some background:
-This is NOT a medical issue. Luca has sensation and control. A few examples:
  • when bottomless, he will find a pull-up or underwear to put on to poop in requiring not only sensation but the ability to hold it until such a time as he is wearing something on his bum to poop into.
  • He can and will hold it all day
  • Once when I could see that he very badly had to go and it was coming, I took him to the toilet and made him sit there for an hour or more and he HELD IT IN (even though it was RIGHT THERE) until only moments after I had given up and let him put his underwear back on
  • He will say that he knows how to poop on the toilet and that he just likes to poop in his pants
And now, a few rules:
  • You MAY NOT say to me that he will one day just "get it". I've heard this a thousand times from well meaning people and it does nothing but frustrate me more. I've been doing this for almost a year, people! Surely you'd think that his one day of getting it would have come by now!
  • You MAY NOT criticize my efforts or my son. I do that enough for all of us, thank you.
  • I promise to try any suggestions that are new or innovative, but like I said, I've tried everything I can find.

Let the competition begin and potty train my child before he is fitted for a colostomy bag and trained to empty it himself!!!


You may notice some aesthetic changes to my blog. I came across and wasted far too much time this afternoon checking out all the fun stuff I can get FOR FREE for my blog.
I have a feeling I will be changing my backgrounds as often as I change my clothes (ok, maybe not that often) because there were so many adorable backgrounds on that site.
So, if you're looking to change it up a bit, head over there and see what you might see. The nice thing is that it gives you directions on just what to do to change your blog.

Have fun!