Friday Night Leftovers

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  It is so windy here today and it is making me so mad! The beautiful 10ft high cedar trellis that my wonderful husband built me was knocked over and with it the new Morning Glory plants that I had nursed indoors from seeds and just planted. I had to go out in the wicked wind and right the trellis, bungee cord it to a post and replant my baby plants. Not a great start to the morning! Plus, the wind is blowing the petals off my tulips!
  


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  A bunch of gals from town got together and ordered coffee disks for our Tassimo coffee makers from the states. I had a Caramel Macchiato this morning and it was wonderful! Since I only ordered 1 package to try, I will have to savour them and not share! Haha!
  
  


A great way to start the morning in my favorite mug!





Chris went away on a "guys weekend" on May Long and for some bizarre reason, I decided that it would be a good time to potty train Levi. Levi turned 3 in April and I had been putting it off and putting it off because of my struggles with Luca (see here and here and here). On the Friday morning I put Levi in underwear and we started the routine of going to the potty regularly. He was doing great and by late morning was even initiating the need to go. At nap time, I decided to leave him in underwear and hope for the best. I told him it was quiet time and that he could only come out of his room to poop or pee. He came out twice to pee (I think mostly because of the novelty of being able to come out) and then came out and said he had to poop. Not really believing that he would actually do it (especially on the first day), I didn't follow him in. A few minutes later, he called me to come look and sure enough, on day 1 of potty training, he was initiating the need to go AND he pooped on the potty all on his own. To say I was ecstatic is an understatement! Since that day, we haven't looked back. He has had some accidents, which is to be expected, but I can confidently say that Levi was potty trained in a weekend. After the fight to get Luca to this point, I never thought I'd be able to say that!




Just after Easter we bought a new (to us) vehicle. We got a 2007 Yukon Denali and I am absolutely smitten with it. I had been wanting something with a bit more space and after riding in a friend's Yukon, I was in love. It took me about a month to convince Chris, but in the end, he was hooked too. We've had it for about a month now and it is still wonderful.





In just under a month, Luca will be done preschool and celebrating his 5th birthday. In just a few months my boy will be starting kindergarten! (Excuse me while I dab my eyes...)



A few months ago I was so discouraged about how slow doula business was. Well, I'm thrilled to say that I am now fully booked until mid-September! I'm on call from now until then and will have a short break (unless I get another client) in September and the beginning of October before another baby is due to arrive at the end of October. Even though it means a quiet summer around home, I'm so excited to be so busy helping families welcome their newest family members!




I haven't had good luck with a vegetable garden since we've lived here. We've decided that it is a combination of poor soil and drainage. This year, my dear husband built me raised beds and we brought in a garden mix soil from a local garden centre in hopes that this year we will have luck. I planted on Tuesday, so here's hoping that it will be successful! I'll keep you posted!



I've really grown to love gardening and choosing perrenials for my flower bed and annuals for my numerous pots and baskets. It gives me great joy to see bulbs, seeds and plants grow and multiply in my garden! I never would have guessed that this would be a new hobby of mine!



The boys are playing soccer this Spring and are doing well and enjoying it. Luca was into it from the start but it took Levi a few practices of crying and clinging to either Chris or me before he would get involved but now he likes to show off his moves!

Please don't look at the disaster that is my living room!

Books of Late

I've gotten so behind in blogging! Oops! I'll try to catch up in the next few posts. Today's post is my monthly book list which I think I'm about 2 months behing on. Oh well.

I just commented on a friend's post about how I find that I am no longer immediately drawn to "fluffy, chick lit" types of books, but actively search out more "meatier" topics. I find that I am really enjoying being challenged in my beliefs, thoughts and am (gasp!) enjoying historical fiction!
My theory is that when I was a student and working, I wanted something for escape so would choose light reads, usually romantic comedyish books. Now that most of my days consist of laundry, housework (rarely!), playing outside, some subbing and occasional births to attend, I find I am longing for something that stimulates my brain a bit more and makes me think. No longer am I looking for something to just pass the time, but I'm looking for something to learn from.

Not that I never read "fluff" any more, but definitely less frequently. Anyway, on to my latest reads:


As I wrote my last book post, I was getting ready to read


The Midwife of Venice

by Roberta Rich



I absolutely loved this one. I loved the storyline and loved that it was historical in setting. It had a wonderful story, laced with mystery, suspense and drama. Highly recommended.

Sarah's Key

by Tatiana de Rosnay

This one was also great. I'd heard many good things about it and its been sitting on my bookshelf for months waiting to be read. Once I started, I couldn't put it down. It was haunting, heartbreaking and incredibly sad at the same time as being humerous, relateable (is that a word?) and a great story of one woman's quest for truth, both in the past and for her future.

The narration alternates between two females: Sarah, a young girl in Paris during WWII, who happens to be Jewish, captured and sent off to a concentration camp with her family and Julia, an American journalist living in Paris and writing for a magazine based there. Both characters are ones that are easy to relate to and easily fall in love with. Following their journeys brought me to tears in more than a few places and when I was done, I sat for a moment, just thinking and thankful of the life I am priveleged to have.

In case you haven't guessed by my review, I highly recommend this book. A definite must read.

From Sarah's Key, I moved on to something a little lighter.

Sleepwalking in Daylight

by Elizabeth Flock

In all honesty, this book was just mediocre. It was an easy read and tried to deal with some pretty juicy characters- a promiscuous, lost, drug using, adopted teenage daughter and her lonely and adulterous mother- but in truth, it didn't stand up to its potential. Not only did I feel that it just dusted the surface of what it could have delved into with these characters, but I thought the ending left too much open. While I was happy with the choice made at the end, it still left me with some unanswered questions and without a sense of closure.

The Red Tent

by Anita Diamant

I'd heard this book talked about, especially within the circles of birthing professionals, but hadn't really given it much thought. When I finally decided to search it out at our local library, I started reading it immediately and absolutely could not put it down.

At first, it is difficult to follow with many Biblical names being thrown into the mix, but after bookmarking the family tree provided at the beginning to use as reference, it got much easier to keep track of who was who.

Here is a short summary taken from Amazon.ca:

The red tent is the place where women gathered during their cycles of birthing, menses, and even illness. Like the conversations and mysteries held within this feminine tent, this sweeping piece of fiction offers an insider's look at the daily life of a biblical sorority of mothers and wives and their one and only daughter, Dinah. Told in the voice of Jacob's daughter Dinah (who only received a glimpse of recognition in the Book of Genesis), we are privy to the fascinating feminine characters who bled within the red tent. In a confiding and poetic voice, Dinah whispers stories of her four mothers, Rachel, Leah, Zilpah, and Bilhah--all wives to Jacob, and each one embodying unique feminine traits. As she reveals these sensual and emotionally charged stories we learn of birthing miracles, slaves, artisans, household gods, and sisterhood secrets. Eventually Dinah delves into her own saga of betrayals, grief, and a call to midwifery.

"Remembering women's earthy stories and passionate history is indeed the theme of this magnificent book. In fact, it's been said that The Red Tent is what the Bible might have been had it been written by God's daughters, instead of her sons." --Gail Hudson


There isn't much that I can say about it other than it was amazingly wonderful, and I have plans to re-read Genesis 27-50 and compare the story in the Bible, to this female version of the story.

Absolutely recommended.


I'm currently reading
Island of Lost Girls
by Jennifer McMahon




I've only just started but the beginning definitely drew me in. I think its going to be an interesting story.

Prizes!!!

Want to enter for your chance to win some great prizes? Head on over to this blog to enter! I'm a new follower but what I've read so far I like! I'll definitely be a regular follower of her blog now!

Thankful Thursday

I'm going to try to make this a regular thing because forcing myself to slow down and remember what I am thankful for is such a great exercise and really reminds me to change my perspective. Today, I am thankful for:

• A best friend. A girlfriend that knows more about me than I do some days. Someone who has been an important part of my life for 12 years and has been there for the wonderful times and the trying times. When I am not available, she is a second mommy to my boys. We have a rare, beautiful friendship and I have to remember to not take it for granted.

• A long, cold winter that has allowed me to be nearly fully booked with Doula clients from June - September! Nothing else to do all winter than make babies, right? ;)

• While we have all been battling minor illnesses, I am thankful for our overall health. A family that I have known most of my life lost their 13 year old son last week to brain cancer. My heart aches for them and their pain. I can't even begin to imagine what they are going through and have walked through the last few years as he battled his illness.

• A supportive, understanding, compassionate staff at our Elementary School. I was subbing in kindergarten yesterday and got a call that Luca had fallen and cut his head and was bleeding a lot. With no questions asked, they found coverage for me within seconds so I could rush out to take him for stitches. Thankfully, it was a small wound with lots of blood (heads bleed like crazy!) and he didn't require stitches, but knowing that I was able to leave without any questions or repercussions was such a relief. And when I walked into the school this morning, the first question asked was how Luca was doing. We are so lucky to have such a caring staff and I am excited for Luca to be a student there next year!

• Even though the snow is not welcome and I've grumbled about it today too, I am thankful that it is only snow, not floods, earthquakes, fires, etc. We have a warm and safe home and if the biggest complaint is that driving is difficult and it is too heavy to shovel, we're doing pretty good.

What are you thankful for?

Brokenhearted Boy

As a parent, you want to do everything you can to protect the feelings of your child and when those inevitable hurts occur, it tears you up because there is nothing you can do to stop the hurt from happening.

Children base their level of friendship on tangible things. They can't rationalize certain situations and know that friendship means more than being invited to things or sharing a snack together.

Being a teacher, I often hear the phrase "You're not invited to my birthday party" come out of the mouths of children trying to hurt the feelings of their friend. Birthday parties are huge for little kids and it is an outward demonstration of friendship.

Last week, my 4 year old son was absolutely devastated to discover that a boy that he thought was one of his favorite little friends was having a birthday party that included many other children from his preschool class and he was not invited. When he asked me if he was invited and I had to respond "I guess not, honey", he looked up at me with his eyes glistening wtih tears and said in a quiet voice "why not, Mommy?".

This broke my heart. My dear, sweet son thought that because of something he did, he was not invited to the party of his little friend. What was I to say to him to explain this?

We try to teach our children to share, play nicely and not leave anyone out, but then when it comes to birthday parties- the biggest event of months for some, and something that the birthday boy or girl are excited to talk about- we allow our children to be selective in who they invite and foster that feeling of superiority for the birthday child and the feeling of inadequacy in the ones that are not invited.

I understand the need to limit numbers for parties- logistically speaking or to fit into a "rule" of children allowed at a birthday party- but to willingly and knowingly do it at the expense of a young child that can't comprehend the reasoning is only teaching our children that it is ok to hurt the feelings of others as long as there is a "reason" to it.

We see this behaviour in adults as well. Those dinner parties that only a select few are invited to, the yearly parties centered around annual events, Christmas parties, etc. Adults are continuing the trend that they learned as children about party ettiquette and are using their party invitations as leverage in friendships and wielding them as superiority swords over their "friends".

With the birthdays of both my boys quickly approaching, I will look past the difficulties of having a larger group of children than I maybe would like, in order to allow my children to invite all the friends they desire so no one feels left out. I don't want my children to learn that it is alright to leave someone out and hurt their feelings at any time, especially for an event that is highly anticipated and publicized in the world of preschoolers.

In a time when teachers ask parents to send a Valentine's Day card or Halloween treat to every child in the class so that no one feels left out, why are we still allowing birthday parties to be elite events for only the select few "worthy" friends?

Now, don't get me wrong, many of the students in the preschool class have invited every child to their parties. I think that when one child doesn't do this, it makes it more obvious and pronounced. When my son asks "I was invited to so-and-so's party and I don't even play with her very often, but I play with so-and-so all the time and he didn't invite me. Why, Mommy?" What is a mother to say?

When I know the answer is that the mother of that child has a "birthday rule" and only invites a set number of children, how do I explain to him that he didn't make the cut this year?

Friendship is not based on numbers and how many children will fit comfortably around a table. I will not allow my children to think for a moment that it is ok to leave someone out because there is not room at our table. We can pull up another chair and make room to include that person. If we are going to instill in our children the importance of sharing, playing together nicely, being honest, etc, it needs to start with events that they can see and relate to.

I want my children to learn from example, and I am going to do my best to ensure that the example set by the boy he thought was a good friend is not the one that he follows. When it comes time to pass out invitations to his friends, I will ensure that no other child has to ask his or her mommy why they weren't invited to celebrate their friend's special day. No child should have to ask that question and no parent should have to try to explain away that hurt.

Thankful Thursday

I'm totally stealing this idea from my dear friend Tasha! I read hers and thought that it was an exercise we should all participate in to remind us of how good we have it! So, on this Thursday, these are things I am thankful for, in no particular order:

• My amazing, good looking, supportive husband. He does so much for us all the time. He is truly my partner in every sense, tackling the parenting and tasks at home as much as I do, plus he works full time to support us. He has been nothing but supportive while I work to make my doula business a success, even when this means that I am busy in the evenings at meetings, so we basically cross paths at the door and he is left to get the kids ready for bed. Even when it means that we won't get as much camping in this summer as we'd like (just like last summer) because it looks like I will be on-call for a good portion of the summer. How did I get so lucky to be blessed with a man like him?

• Finally some sunshine and Spring weather!

• The opportunity to do some promotion of my doula business. I am fortunate to be a part of the Airdrie Welcome Wagon baby shower, which will give me exposure to over 100 expecting or new moms. That event takes place on Monday, April 11. I was also very lucky to be able to speak at a prenatal session with a doula that I love and respect. We were honored to be asked to share the benefits of doula care with a group of 12 expectant moms. Out of that meeting, I have already arranged 2 potential client meetings- one for a mamma expecting twins! I was discouraged a few months ago at the slow pace of doula work, but things are beginning to pick up again and I am really excited to be able to do what I love again!

• Time with family.

• I am thankful that I have a handful of truly great, wonderful friends. These girls are ones that I know without a doubt I can count on to help out when needed or to be a listening ear and never keep tabs and expect anything in return (and they know they have the same with me). They are women that I admire, respect and love deeply. Some live very near and others I don't get to see as often as I'd like, but they are all equally dear to me and each have a very special place in my life. Really true friends are not always easy to find, but I have been blessed with a few of them and for that I am truly grateful.

What are you thankful for?

Smart phones can be Scary phones!

I just read this article on my friend Canadian Mama's blog and watched the clip she provided and it scared me! Technology can be so wonderful but it can also be so dangerous. If you have ever taken and uploaded a photo from your phone, you're going to want to take a look at the clip.

My March Book List

I didn't get as much read this month as I usually do for a few reasons:

-I worked a ton in March subbing. A few opportunities came up to be in the same classroom for 3-5 days at a time so I took those. I enjoyed the days that I was working, even though it was quite a bit more than I usually take on in a month.

-Chris and I are a wee bit addicted to Prison Break. We watch it on Netflix. It started with Chris watching the first season and me reading my book beside him. I quickly realized that I was doing much more watching than reading and finally decided to just watch with him. We are now about to start Season 4, so not only did I lose a lot of reading time to tv, I anticipate that the same will happen for the next few weeks as we watch the final season. I did manage to get through a couple books though.

Firstly, I finished the one I had started when I wrote my last post.

Testimony
by Anita Shreve

Truth be told, I didn't love this book. It started out strong and had my attention but as the book went on, my attention waned. Somewhat due to Prison Break distracting me, but also because I felt that it was dragging on a bit and I wasn't very satisfied with the ending. It wasn't terrible, but also not one for my favorties list.

Heaven is For Real
by Todd Burpo


I read a synopsis of this book one morning while at work and thought it sounded interesting. Later that afternoon, I stopped into our community library to have a look at our new renovations and was pleasantly surprised to see this book on our New Releases shelf. Even though I was still reading Testimony, I signed it out anyway. As soon as I was done reading Testimony, I started on this one and read it in 2 days (work interrupted my reading time! Haha).

Whether you believe in Heaven or not, or are or aren't a Christian, I thought that this book was fascinating. It is a true account written from the point of view of a father whose son nearly died and over the course of the next few years, reveals details of Heaven that he saw when he was on the brink of death. Things that this boy could not have known, he casually revealed to his parents, such as meeting his father's grandfather, whom he had never met, but picked out of a photograph that he had never seen before. Or telling his parents that he met the sister his mother miscarried before he was born.

The book was incredibly easy to read and is truly fascinating and is making news headlines all over the place. I definitely recommend this, regardless of your beliefs. Perhaps you will be challenged a bit reading this....



Check it out here.

Sing You Home
by Jodi Picoult

I am almost finished this one. I always look forward to her books being released. I've read a large majority of her books and always find them to be controversial, emotional and addictive. Jodi Picolt never fails to put controversial topics front and centre in her novels and her research and attention to the topics are obvious. I love that the story itself is easy to read and captivating and yet, her novels challenge my beliefs and make me ask questions. I love that about them.

I also love the way that she alternates different perspectives throughout the book. She writes from the point of view of each main character, which really allows the reader to see a clear picture of all sides of the issue and weaves compassion for each character's motives and beliefs. By the end of the book, my position on the topic at hand has probably bounced back and forth a number of times. I'm looking forward to finishing this one.

Have a look at it here.

The Midwife of Venice by Roberta Rich

This book is next in line after I finish Sing You Home. I'm looking forward to this one because I quite enjoy historical fiction, and also because the topic is something that I am drawn to. Watch for my opinion on this one next month!

Read the synopsis here.

What have you read this month?

I'm always looking for new books to add to my reading list, so any suggestions are great!

Which one?

I saw this on facebook this morning and thought it would be a fun question to ask...


If you could have a nanny, a housekeeper or a personal chef which one would you pick and why?

I'm not sure which one I'd pick....its a tough question.

Right now, Luca has been sick for 4 days. I'm working all week and Chris works, so we have had a bit of a dilemma.

If I give up my sub days to stay home, I lose all the days I am booked for because they want the same teacher in for all the days for continuity. If I gave up all 5 days, I would lose more money than I usually make in a month. Plus, it reflects badly on my part to have to cancel sub days, especially when the teacher requested me specifically.

Chris took 2 days to stay home, but to take a third day, he needs a doctor's note. Things are still up in the air for tomorrow and Friday. Its been a stressful week, and Murphy's Law states that

Luca would become sick for days on end during the worst possible week.

So, for this week, I would choose a Nanny. Then there wouldn't be the stress of trying to juggle childcare. I would know that I could leave Luca and Levi at home with the nanny and not worry.

However, I definitely don't need a nanny full time. I like to be the mommy.

A housekeeper... Who wouldn't love to have someone else do the cleaning and laundry? That is what I most often fall behind on, so it would be great to have someone do that for me. But, I know I would be embarrassed about the mess, so I would tidy before the housekeeper came so she wouldn't judge me. Kinda defeats the point.

A Personal Chef....this would be my last choice because I actually don't mind doing the cooking. It would be nice to have some new meal ideas and have someone ensure that they are healthy, balanced meals. Since I do a monthly meal plan, I don't find making supper as stressful as I used to. It used to be that suddenly it was 4 in teh afternoon and I would stress about finding something to make for supper. Now I don't have that stress. I look at the calendar and know what to make. I also TRY to have some variation in the meals we eat and I do my best to ensure that we have balanced meals.

What would be your pick and why?

If I Had my Child To Raise Over Again

After reading my last post, one of my Aunts sent me this poem. I love it and am going to print it out and hang it somewhere that I can see it every day to remind myself to worry less about the house and more about having fun with my kids.

Thanks Auntie Leigh!


If I Had my Child To Raise Over Again

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars,
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often,
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I'd model less about the love of power,
And more about the power of love.


--Diana Loomans

The Other Mothers

Wow, two posts in one day, almost a new record for me!

I came across this on another blog that I read and it struck me as so true, and exactly what I needed right now as I sit here in my yoga pants, dirty hair pulled into a ponytail, and no sign of supper on the go and it it 4:30pm.

This article reminded me that I don't have to try to be supermom, that I can't do everything and that sometimes I need to just throw my hands up in the air and say "you know what? I didn't vacuum today or do the laundry or even make supper." We'll go out for supper and the floors will stay dirty for another day, but I spent the day with my kids. We colored, we sprayed the snow and we pretended to drive a firetruck in our basement. That's what being a mom is all about.

I sometimes let myself forget that and get lost in the idea that I have to have a perfectly clean house, fresh baking cooling on the counter and perfectly behaved children. I'm trying to give myself permission to just play with my boys and not worry about all the other stuff. They are only little for a short time and I don't want to look back and regret not painting with them or playing playdough (even though I can't stand the mess it makes!).

Read the great article The Other Mothers by Allyson Reynolds and come back and tell me this:

What do you find you compare yourself to other mothers about? What do you do to remind yourself that you don't have to be Supermom?

Friday Night Leftovers

• Last weekend Dee and I went to Camrose for a Stella and Dot party that Dee was doing (she's a S&D stylist) for her old roommate. We decided a while ago that it would be fun to have a "roomie reunion"- her and her roomie and me and mine. Both of our roommates still live in Camrose, so it was easy to arrange. Dee and Trina lived directly across the hall from Laura and I in our first year at Augustana 12 years ago!! The four of us had some good times that first year. While I have kept in regular contact with Laura, I hadn't seen Trina in years so it was a ton of fun to reminice and get caught up on our lives now. Dee and I also went with Laura to tour the new library and "central" building that was recently built on campus. So many changes but there were still so many memories tucked into every corner of that campus.

• I've been subbing a lot this month. I've been ignoring my twice a week "rule" and have taken some stretches in the same classroom for 3 or more days. Its easy to do when those stretches of days are in my favorite places- a stretch of 3 days in kindergarten and another stretch of 5 days at the Virtual School. I'm looking forward to a nice paycheque after this month!

• The sun has been shining the past few days and we are all getting Spring Fever! The boys are still loving to go out and spray the snow, and with the warmer weather they are staying out even longer, just coming into the house for refills on their colored water. I even had the windows open the other day and the cool but fresh breeze was so welcome and refreshing!

• I've got some events coming up that I am hoping will help to promote my doula business. A few "trade shows" of sorts and a speaking opportunity at a prenatal class. I'm really hoping that I will get some clients and contacts out of these events and that I can get my business growing. I absolutely love being a doula and its hard to not get frustrated when I haven't got clients lined up, but I'm trying to stay positive and remind myself that building a business and client base take time and I need to be patient.

• I'm working on a new project for our library board and I am so excited about it. I got the idea when we were visiting the Augustana library last weekend and decided then and there to get to work implementing it in Crossfield. This fall I am planning to have the first of many (hopefully) sessions of a Living Library. The concept is that rather than reading a memoir, someone (the "author") comes and tells their story. The audience (or "reader") then has the opportunity to ask questions and direct a discussion. Its an intimate and interactive way of hearing someone's unique story. I think that this will provide some more opportunities for people in our community to get out and participate in free events, as well as to connect people on a personal level when they share or hear their stories. If you have or know of someone who has an interesting and unique story to tell, please contact me! I'd love to hear from you! The Living Library concept is actually an international program that you can read about here.

• Happy Friday, everyone! The visit the host of this weekly blog event, go here!

Did You Know?

A really interesting video that I saw posted on facebook today. Really shows how our world is changing...at a pace we can hardly keep up with. I think that this was created in 2008 so it is probably fairly outdated in its stats already. But, it is interesting nonetheless...

Book List

I've been meaning to do this for a while, ever since some of my other friends began doing posts similar to this on their blogs.

I love to read and always have a book (or 2) on the go. I don't always get through them as quickly as I'd like due to work, kids and other commitments cutting into my reading time, but I do read quite a few books.

I'm going to try to do a monthly list of all the books I've read (good or not so good) but this post will be more like a collection of the best ones that I have read over the past few months.


Unbearable Lightness
by Portia de Rossi




I loved this book. It was difficult to read at parts but it was really well written and had such a powerful message. I saw Portia on Ellen and Oprah talking about her book and she chose not to have a co-author for this book because she wanted all the words to be her own. She only wanted her story to be told, not the story that another person thought would sound better. I was even more impressed with the book after hearing that. It is written so well and flows nicely.

To read an exerpt from this book, go here.


Left Neglected
by Lisa Genova

I loved this book as well. When I read Lisa Genova's first book Still Alice, I couldn't put it down. It was such an easy read with a unique subject and I wondered if her second book would meet my expectations. It absolutely did. I couldn't put this one down. Again, it was a unique topic and her writing style is so easy to lose yourself in. I definitely recommend this book.

Synopsis here.

The Doula Guide to Birth

by Ananda Lowe and Rachel Zimmerman

I actually read this one because I was looking for a good book to be part of a few giveaways I was taking part in for my doula business. I wanted something easy to read and understand, not something that read like a textbook. This book was that and more. It was written from the point of view of two women that are both mothers and doulas. I felt that they did a great job of explaining what it is that a doula does and how a doula contributes to the birth process, as well as giving some really useful and essential tips for couples to use during pregnancy and labour. This book was the one that I chose for my giveaways. If you are expecting or know someone who is, this is a great book.

Room

by Emma Donoghue

I read this book in November, shortly after it was released and before I had heard all the "buzz" about it. I was initially drawn to the cover (yes, I totally judge a book by its cover!) and then the topic definitely drew me in. Written from the point of view of a young boy who has been raised in a small shed his entire life while he and his mother are held captive by their abuser, it is the story of their life in their "room" and their plans for escape. I was mesmerized by not only the topic but the author's ability to draw me in and have me seeing the world through the eyes of a boy who has never left the confines of the shed. A fantastic read, highly recommended.


Synopsis here.




Look Again

by Lisa Scottoline

I'm not much of a mystery reader but this one attracted me just from the short synopsis. A woman discovers that her adopted son, who she thought was abandoned as an infant, was actually kidnapped and then abandoned by his kidnappers. When the adopted mother finds out that her son's birth parents are still desperately holding out hope that their son will be found, she has to wrestle with doing the right thing, even if it means losing her son. As a mother, I can't even imagine having to make the choice that would ultimately mean I would lose my child, but also can't imagine being the mother yearning for her child's return.

I really enjoyed this book and think that the ending will surprise you but leave you with a sense of closure.

Synopsis here.

A Vintage Affair

by Isobel Wolff

Another book that I was first initially attracted to the bright, fun cover. I loved this one. It was a great "chick lit" read, something I haven't been reading much of lately. I've been trying to expand my reading horizons and have purposefully been avoiding the "fluff" books that I was drawn to in the past. But, this was a welcome break and really easy to lose myself in the story.



If you are looking for a great "beach read", something that is purely entertainment, this is the book for you. It had a great story and was so easy to read. A perfect bathtub read or holiday read.



Synopsis here.



The Unexpected Son

by Siobhan Bantwal



I LOVED Shilpi Somaya Gowda's Secret Daughter (see my post here) and this one was similar in that it is set in India and is full of beautiful descriptions of the culture and scenery. While the title might seem like it would be similar to the story in Secret Daughter, it isn't. I loved that this book gave me a greater understanding of the Indian culture and allowed me to create some beautiful pictures in my mind of a place I've never been. It was a beautifully written book with a story that captured my interest. If you liked Secret Daughter, you'll like this one!



Synopsis here.




Rescue

by Anita Shreve


I gave this book to a friend as a birthday gift and eagerly waited for her to finish it and lend it to me. I thought it was a good read but not my favorite. I liked the point of view and the story and it was a nice, quick read. Good entertainment even though it didn't strike me as one of my favorites.



Synopsis here.



Testimony

by Anita Shreve



This is one of my current reads. I'm only a few chapters into this one but am enjoying it immensely. The first page really sucked me in and I can't wait to find out where this story takes me. I'll try to remember to update on my thoughts in my next book post.




Money Smart Mom
by Sarah Deveau

My other current read. The author is a business woman that lives in Airdrie. I know of her (our paths have crossed at a few events) and she recently spoke at MOPS on her book. I like that the book is from not only a Canadian perspective but a local perspective as well. She has some great tips and others that are just not for us, but overall I'm finding that its a worthwhile read. I'm hoping that once I finish the book and decide on which suggestions to implement I will have a whole post about it!

What are you reading these days? What is on your "must read" list right now?

Snow Art!

Get some spray bottles from the Dollar Store, fill them with water and food coloring.

Give them to your children to decorate the snow:

And just like that you have your very own Snow Art

AND as a bonus, it keeps the children entertained for as long as it takes to use up all the water!

Note to self:
Maybe next time, don't use yellow food coloring. Looks too much like pee and takes away from the pretty-ness of it all. ;)

Single Parenting - Clarification

Wow. Apparently my post about single parenting hit a nerve with some people.

I got a few private emails about it and some of them weren't very nice at all.

So, just to clarify- I realize that there are people out there who single parent for whatever reason; people that truly are single parents 100% of the time. These are NOT the people I was talking about. I believe that "true" single parents are strong and I admire them. They don't have a date to count down to til their partner is home. There is no break in sight.

I was talking about MY relationship with MY husband and HIS relationship with OUR kids.

I do not like it when my husband is gone. The kids do not like it.

See, we are used to having him home, so when he goes away, everything is turned on its head. We don't have a smooth routine that works well when he is away.

Instead, which has been obvious this trip, is that Luca acts up. He has been whiney, disobedient and mean to his brother. He even had to be spoken to at school for not listening and that just isn't like him.

Levi cried every morning when he came into our bedroom expecting to see Daddy on his side of the bed and didn't find him there. Every night Levi cried, saying "I miss my Daddy". This is heartbreaking to me.

At 2 and 4 years old, the boys still struggle with the passing of time and how long 12 days is. To them, it is a lifetime.

Plus, just to add insult to injury, I've been sick for nearly the entire time Chris has been gone.

So, for those of you that took offence to my post about how I don't want to be a single parent and that I didn't sign on to do this all the time, take it for what it is. Take it for what I said.

I don't want to do this all the time.

And I don't have to.

Thank God for that.

Chris comes home tonight!!!!

Single Parenting

Chris is in Houston for 12 days. We have 6 more days to go.

I won't lie. Its been tough. I hate when he has to go away and this is the longest he has had to go in as long as I can remember. The boys are at an age now where they really miss their Daddy when he is gone and as much as I love being able to sleep diagonally across our bed, I miss the warm, solid, comforting body of my husband lying next to me more.

Plus this has been a trying week with me being sick - first with a vicious flu and now with a nasty head cold.

Being a single parent is not something that I enjoy. At all.

When Chris and I were dating, we lived an hour apart. I was in college an hour away from the city he lived and worked in. Three years of our relationship as a couple was spent over the phone Monday to Friday and at either our parents' houses on the weekend or in Edmonton where he lived. We got really good at communicating verbally but I couldn't wait for the day that we could be married and share a home.

When we got married, the first few months of adjusting to living with someone else was tough, but spending every evening and weekend together was so worth it.

Shortly after we both graduated from our programs, Chris got a well paying job in the field he had gone to school for. Unfortunately, this job required him to be away quite a bit. I was working full time before I became pregant so it wasn't as lonely as I thought. Until I was pregnant and feeling rotten all the time and then I was an exhausted new mom.

Chris did this job for a few years, right up until Luca was a year old. It was really tough. The majority of Luca's first year dealing with sleep deprivation, teething, illness, and big milestones was "enjoyed" by me alone. It was really difficult being the one at home to have to shoulder the difficulties of life with a baby all by myself. But it was equally as hard for Chris to have to miss out on the first time Luca crawled, his first steps, and his first words.

We didn't choose to get married and have children so we could live apart and he could be a Daddy a few days out of the month. It was tough on everyone.

When the opportunity came up for Chris to take an office position within his company, we had many serious conversations about it. It would mean moving 2 hours away - to a place where we didn't really know anyone and had no connections. There were tears on my part because I was scared to leave the town I knew, the family and friends that were nearby and our first home.

And taking the job would mean a pay cut. Gone would be the overtime, the "bonus" pay for working away, etc. Being at the peak time for the housing market in Alberta, it would also mean leaving our relatively low mortgage and taking on a much larger one.

It was a decision that we didn't take lightly.

But what ultimately won out was that Chris would be home every night at dinner time and every weekend. We would be a married couple living together and a Daddy that got to tuck his son into bed every night. That was worth every penny lost in pay to us.

With this office job comes some travel, but it is usually just Monday to Friday one week out of every few months. Its not ideal, but we can handle that.

Just like the choice we made for me to be at home with our children during these precious young years, it was equally as important that Chris be home during these years as well.

When Levi was born, Chris didn't have to miss out on his big milestones. In fact, I'm fairly certain that it was Chris that got Levi to crawl for the first time.

This is the life that we wanted for our family.

I am missing Chris so much this trip. And I'm getting tired of people saying to me "you should try being a single parent all the time" or "you should try doing it every other week".

No thank you.

I didn't choose to be a part time single parent, part time partner. We made sacrifices so that we didn't have to live that life.

I realize that for some, this isn't an option. Some people have to deal with working away for whatever reason. We had to do it too for a few years. But, when there was an opportunity for us to live as a full time family, we took it.

One thing that Chris and I firmly believe is that our family comes first. Any major decision is always weighed against what would be best for our family.

And what is best for our family is that our boys have their Daddy home every night. When Chris walks in the door at 6 o'clock, the boys are as excited to see him as if he'd just been gone for days. We share a family dinner together at the table every night, even though it means that I deal with hungry, crabby kids from 5-6 until Daddy gets home. Its important to us, so we make it work.

After supper, Chris bathes the boys and gets them jammied and reads them stories, then we both tuck them into bed. Then we spend the evening together, the two of us, husband and wife - talking, watching tv, whatever.

This is our routine. This is our family. This is our life. I wouldn't change it for anything.

So, for those of you that have challenged me to "do it all the time", sorry but I won't be taking that challenge. I don't want to and we have made the choice to not have to.

The boys miss their Daddy so much and I miss my husband, my partner. Friday night can't come soon enough.

Disneyland! (a teaser)

I promise that I have an entire post about our trip in my head and I will sit down to write it very soon, but until then, one of my favorite photos from our trip...

An explanation

I know that many of you have been checking regularly for a new post and haven't found one in a while.

I've sort of put blogging on a back burner for now. It wasn't a conscious decision, just something that happened.

With Christmas and other things going on the past month, blogging fell to the bottom of my priority list.

I'm trying to focus my energy on my little family, rather than all the other "stuff" that has been consuming my days lately.

We leave for Disneyland in 1 week and I couldn't be more excited! I promise to blog about our trip when we return.

I fully intend to return refreshed and rejuvenated and will maybe have thrown my negative feelings and issues into the Pacific Ocean where they will be carried away...

Until then, thanks my faithful "checkers" (I'd say readers, but there hasn't been anything new to read, so since you check, I've dubbed you "checkers".).

Why I doula

For the past month or so, I have been struggling with why I doula. Should I continue? Is it something that I should do?

These doubts came up because it seemed that I wasn't getting clients when fellow doulas were getting them in droves. Clients that I met with that I thought had made a connection with me hired others. After a few of these situations, it really took a toll on me and I started to doubt myself and question my choice.

Then I attended the birth of a wonderful friend. Being there for the first breaths of a new life reminded me why I love what I do and why I am going to trudge through the tough times to get to the busy times.

Even still though, there was a niggling voice that came up every now and then that made me doubt myself. You see, the most recent birth that I attended was very fast and I wasn't allowed in the room until the mama was admitted, which was also at the pushing stage.

I was so frustrated and felt like I had let my cleint and friend down by not being there while she went through hard labour (no fault of my own- hospital policy. I was, in fact, waiting outside the doors to the L&D unit). Even after her affirmations that hiring me was worth it, I still wondered "was it really? Did I really do anything that she couldn't have done without me?"

Then this evening, I am told to read this post.

Go there now....

I cried. It did my heart good.

I am a doula because I want to be. Because there is nothing in this world like welcoming a new baby into the world. I will get through this slow period and my day will come that I am as busy as my cohorts.

I am a doula and I love it with every fibre in me.

I am alive!

Wow. I realized when Chris told me that I was really falling behind on my blog that it was serious. I actually recently discovered that he actually checks it of his own accord, not just when I tell him to.

So, to my few (if I have any left) faithful readers, I apologize. I'm lazy, that's really my only excuse. I could say that I have been working (true), gone on a 4 day trip to the mountains (also true) and just plain busy (true...sort of), but I'm not going to make excuses. I'm a no good, terrible, very bad blogger.

But I have some exciting news to share!!!

Last night I booked our tickets to DISNEYLAND!!!!!

I'm really not sure who is more excited- me or the kids. No, wait. I do know. Its most definitely me! I've never been to Disneyland (or California, for that matter) and got a teensy weency taste of Disneyworld when I was in Florida this summer. I'm am just beyond excited to get to go and to get to experience it with my boys.

And since I am not breaking into a sweat at the thought of getting on an airplane, I'm actually excited for the boys to experience their first flight. They are both fascinated with airplanes and I think that they will think its pretty cool.

We are going to be in Anaheim from January 26 to February 3. I just by chance checked the WestJet site last night to discover that yesterday was the last day of a seat sale and that we could book our seats for $148 each! Both ways! This is a small fraction of the price that the tickets were a few months ago. We've been waiting for a seat sale but I'd been slacking in watching the site. I'm glad I checked last night! So, for just ober $300 each, we can fly to and from California.

We had originally thought we would go from the 26 of January and come home the 1st of February but Chris pointed out that we would essentially have 2 days of travel that wouldn't really be "holiday". So, after checking the seat prices to see that the rates were the same a few days later, we (I) decided to stay for a few more days, giving us some more time to spend going to the parks, the beach, shopping...whatever!

We are planning to rent a condo so that we have a bit more space and can prepare the majority of our meals and pack lunches to be the most cost effective. I have found a few very close to Disneyland, so the next step is to just book one! Then we'll need to rent a car, but other than that, the big things will be booked!

I got the boys their passport photos today and was anticipating a battle to get them to sit "just so" and look "just so" but with one shot of each of them, we had it! They were champs, sitting still and not smiling. Yay! The forms are almost completed and we can get those off.

Things are really coming together! I'm so excited!!!!

Friday Night Leftovers

• I went for a very long overdue cut and color today. My hair looks so nice! I went a bit out of my comfort zone to try something new and I love it! I went quite dark on the bottom half of my hair, then a combination of blonde and brown hilights and lowlights throughout the top half. My bangs are also thicker. I didn't get much in the way of a cut, just my same long, layered style. The girl that did my hair is a new friend and we had a great visit getting to know each other while I sat in the chair. She took a few extra minutes to curl my hair in big, loose curls. It looks so pretty but I'm a bit sad because I know I won't be able to recreate the look quite the same. Oh well. Its fun to try something new!

• Luca is loving preschool. He looks forward to it every week and I am thrilled with the program that they offer. I didn't expect it to be so academic, but they are doing an animated literacy program, learning about the food groups and healthy choices and even have a mini grocery store set up so the kids can "purchase" their healthy foods while learning about money! Luca is always so proud to show me the work that he did that day and to talk about the new letters and sounds they they focussed on.

• MOPS is in full swing and Levi is loving MOPS days. So am I. As a Discussion Group leader this year, I was a bit nervous about how I might lead the group so that everyone got a chance to share and get to know eachother. I got a fantastic group of ladies and I'm so excited about the new friendships that this year will bring.

• I'm subbing on average a day a week which is just perfect for me. So far, its going great. I've had the privelege of being in kindergarten, grade 2 and even at a Hutterite colony!

• Just a teaser about another post I have in my head waiting to be written- I've been more and more interested in municipal politics. I know. You're thinking "not Janice!". Its a surprise to me too! Watch for my post about my new and surprising interests as of late.

• Yesterday was 22 degrees above. Gorgeous fall weather. Today it is 3 degrees and snowy. Got to love Alberta! You can never get too used to the beautiful weather because you never know how long it'll be around for.

• Chris is off to Houston next weekend, so I'll have the week leading up to Halloween on my own with the boys. I am anticipating a lot of activity that week as the boys get excited about trick or treating.

Affirmation

I'm learning to tell people about books or articles that I have read that have touched me in some way. I used to tell one or two people about it but that's it.



Having a friend that is a writer and hearing from her perspective how important it is for writers to get feedback on their work has prompted me to be more forthcoming with my feelings and impressions on writing.



Today I discovered that another writer, Shilpi Somaya Gowda , author of Secret Daughter appreciated my "review" (if you will call it that) of her book. A quote from that post that I wrote has appeared on her website under the Reviews tab. (Near the bottom if you are looking).

More that being touched that someone would take a quote from me to put on their blog, I was proud of myself for making my feelings about a book known so that others might appreciate the book as I did.

If Ms. Gowda is anything like my friend, I'm sure that each nice thing that is written about her writing touches her and she appreciates it. I'm glad that I was able to (in a roundabout way) let her know just how much I truly enjoyed her book.

Tagged!

My aunt tagged me in this fun little bloggy game and I had no reason not to play along. I love random posts about random things.

As part of the "game" I am to answer the following:

1. What was your most embarrasing moment?

Funny that this question came from my aunt because my most embarrassing moment (one of them, anyway) occurred at her house when I was about 13. My cousins (all male but 1), their friends (mostly all male, and one in particular that I had a crush on), and myself were swimming in the dugout near their house. Thinking of that brown water that we regularly swam in makes me shudder now. Eww. Anyway, I had borrowed a bathing suit from someone. I'm not sure who because it was too big, meaning that it could not have been my younger female cousin's. We were all taking turns jumping off the "dock" into the water. When my turn came, I jumped in and popped back up for air. However, my bathing suit did not. I emerged from the murky brown water topless. I was absolutely mortified. Even recalling this story makes me embarrassed.

I have many other embarrassing moments but I will save myself the humiliation for today. Let's just say that one happened as early as last spring, while I was subbing in Grade 1. It involved split pants, a stapler, bright blue panties and a cute guest instructor. I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

2. Do you recycle? Why or why not?

Yes and no. We recycle paper and cardboard and cans and bottles. The rest of the stuff that I could recycle never seems to make it there. Probably mostly laziness on my part. And also because the recycling centre in town here is really not very accessable in that it is only open for short periods of time on certain days. Makes recycling everything too much hassle.

3. What is the most dangerous thing you've ever done?

I have no idea. I'm such a chicken and always play things safe. I may not have ever done something dangerous. Haha

4. what is your favorite movie and why?

I have a few. Dirty Dancing, Pretty Woman, Grease. I think probably what I like most is the romantic aspect in each of them. I love Dirty Dancing for the dancing, of course and Grease for the singing and dancing (I love musicals!). Pretty Woman is just one of those movies that I can watch over and over again. I love the shopping scenes and love to watch Julia Roberts' character grow from a lost woman to someone that is confident in herself. Plus, Richard Gere is a pretty darn good looking old guy.

5. Do you follow a sport on TV?

Ummmm, no. Enough said.

6. If you could live at any time in history for 1 year, when would it be?

Totally the early 1900s. I love their clothing, manners, way of life. I just love it. I would have absolutely loved to work somewhere like Heritage Park or Fort Edmonton Park.

7. What was/is your favorite school subject?

Language Arts/ English. I've always loved to read, so this subject came fairly easily to me. Best one to teach? Science. So much fun now that I am an adult!

8. What game do you most enjoy playing with a group?

I love to play games. Board games, card games, I'm usually in! Quite a fun one is called "Things". It is definitely one to play if you are getting to know someone and want a way to break the ice. Be prepared to laugh and be silly!

Ok, I think I am supposed to come up with my own questions, but I'm going to cheat a bit and just tell you to answer these same ones. Also, I am too tired to actually link your blog, so if you are reading this, you have to play along! Leave me a comment when you do so I can go read your answers!

The things kids say...

Yesterday we were in Ponoka at Chris' parents' house. Chris's sister and her 4 children were there as well. The 11 of us were eating dinner and chatting when Luca says:

Luca: "Nona?"
Nona: "Yes Luca?"
Luca: "Why are you so old?"


Needless to say, all the adults around the table burst out laughing, but Luca was quite serious. I can't remember if Nona answered him or not...

God and Babies

This is a conversation I had with Luca this morning. I thought it was pretty cute and a pretty good example of how a 4 year old's brain processes things.


To set the scene, I was looking at photos on my aunt's blog. When I came upon a picture of her son, Luca asked who that guy was and I replied Daniel.

Luca "Is that your cousin"
Me "yes, it is. You're very smart."
Luca "where are his kids?"
Me "He doesn't have any kids."
Luca "Why not?"
Me "Its not his time to have kids yet."
Luca "Are they in his tummy?"
Me "no, he would be a daddy because he is a boy. Only mommies have babies in their tummies."
Luca "Oh. (pause) so, is God making his babies for him then?"
Me "Yes, God is making them for when it is his time to have babies."
Luca "where is his factory?"
Me (after chuckling a bit) "God makes babies in Heaven"
Luca "Oh, so God makes babies in heaven? Does he live there?"
Me "yes"
Luca "Is God the boss of Heaven?"
Me "I guess you could say that."
Luca "Hmmm. God is a boss who makes babies..." (said thoughtfully while walking away)

Our Big Boy

Today was a special day. The fact that it was our 8th wedding anniversary was overshadowed by Luca's first day of playschool.

For the last week leading up to today, Luca has been beside himself with excitement for school. He would ask every morning if "today was school day". He chose his lunchkit (Batman) and his backpack (Ironman - which I thought funny that he even knew who he was. Boys will be boys, I guess. Too cool for the Cars backpack now.).

When we went last week to meet his teacher, he wanted so badly to take his lunch kit and backpack. He was thrilled to give Daddy the tour of his classroom (I had already seen it when we registered), he was a bit shy when his teacher introduced herself, and loved to check out the toys and centres.

Yesterday I began to have mixed feelings about this momentous event. On one hand, Luca's excitement was so contagious, I couldn't help but be excited with him. But the mommy in me was sad, tears threatening to spill, questioning where the time went and how could it be that my first baby was starting school the next day?

This morning, Luca woke up just before 7am, crawled into our bed and snuggled. When I was truly awake, he said "Is today school day, Mommy?", knowing full well that it was. He was thrilled to find a "first day of school" gift waiting for him on the table at breakfast (some Firefighter action figures). He ate his breakfast quickly so that he would have a few minutes of play time with his new toys.

When I got him upstairs to get dressed, he was pleased to choose from his 4 new shirts (that he picked out when we went shopping) for his school outfit. He quickly got dressed and then announced that he would do "spikeys" in his own hair, that he was old enough now. He needed "school hair like Daddy has work hair". (haha)

Another moment of realizing that my baby was a big boy- he hauled his stool over to the counter, squirted some gel into his hands (under my watchful eye so as not to bathe in gel) and worked it into his hair. The end result required a bit of fixing by Mommy (glad to see he still needs me a bit!) but he was so proud to have done it (almost) on his own.

Before getting into the Jeep, photos on the front step were taken.






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During the ride into Carstairs, Luca was fairly quiet, with the odd question about school breaking the silence. We were all lost in our thoughts, I guess.

When we arrived, Luca was excited to see his friends, his teacher and most of all, the paint! We hung his backpack on his hook, took a few more pictures and I started to say my goodbyes before heading out and leaving him for the morning. When it was time for a hug, I got a tighter, longer hug than I have in a long time. There were no tears (although at this point, I was close) and he assurred me that he would have a good day and tell me all about it when I picked him up.

And with that, off he went to explore all the activities.

Dee and I walked down the stairs with mixed feelings. We were both proud that our kids didn't seem too rattled about being left for the morning, excited at this milestone, but also sad for the time that has seemingly whizzed by.

While we were chatting by our vehicles, the playschool class came out of the building on their way to play in the park for a while. Luca and Adelynn were holding hands, bringing up the rear. They didn't see us watching them from across the street among the vehicles. They looked so grown up. So confident. So excited.

At 1pm, when I arrived to pick up Luca, he turned and gave me an enormous smile, ran to me and wrapped his arms around my neck. In my ear he whispered "I like it here!". What a reassurance to me that he did great and was comfortable there.

All the way home he chattered about what they did and stories the teacher read. It was wonderful to listen to the excitement in his voice, with a few yawns thrown in too. When I asked if he was tired, he replied "oh mom, all those kids made me so tired!". He fell asleep within moments of being in his bed tonight.

By all accounts, it was a great first day and he can't wait for Thursday so he can go again.

Secret Daughter

Quite a few months ago, I came across a book during one of my visits to the bookstore. After reading the back cover, I added the title to my list of books to read in my Blackberry and continued on.

I'd see reviews for the book in various magazines and on summer reading lists. I always made a mental note to see if it was in the library, but would then be distracted by my current book(s).

During one of my visits to the library, there was that book again, staring back at me from the shelves. I already had 3 or 4 books in my hand at that point so decided to wait until next time to get it. (Our library is small and I don't usually have to wait more than a week or two to get a book on the off chance that it is out when I want it.)

The next time I went, there it was again, beckoning me, but once again, I had an armful of other books. I left without taking it with me.

Every visit to the library saw me pick up the book, consider it, then put it back on the shelf. I have no idea why I didn't takie it home, when I knew I wanted to read it.

Finally, on my last visit there, I signed out that book and nothing else. From the first page, I was drawn into another world.

Secret Daughter by Shilpi Somaya Gowda was an incredible, touching, thought provoking, heart wrenching read.


From the back cover:

On the eve of the monsoons, in a remote Indian village, Kavita gives birth to a baby girl. But in a culture that favors sons, the only way for Kavita to save her newborn daughter's life is to give her away. It is a decision that will haunt her and her husband for the rest of their lives, even after the arrival of their cherished son.

Halfway around the globe, Somer, an American doctor, decides to adopt a child after making the wrenching discovery that she will never have one of her own. When she and her husband, Krishnan, see a photo of the baby with the gold-flecked eyes from a Mumbai orphanage, they are overwhelmed with emotion. Somer knows life will change with the adoption but is convinced that the love they already feel will overcome all obstacles.

Interweaving the stories of Kavita, Somer, and the child that binds both of their destinies, Secret Daughter poignantly explores the emotional terrain of motherhood, loss, identity, and love, as witnessed through the lives of two families-one Indian, one American-and the child that indelibly connects them.

Rarely do I find a book that I can't put down. This was one of them. This passage from the book really sums up the emotion in the book:

"[She] managed to find hope in the most unlikely place. In the midst of the poverty and despair of the slums, she showed the fierceness of a mother's love. And how we're really all the same in that way."

Put this book on your reading list and don't walk past it on the shelves! You won't regret it!